Changing Your Maiden Name After Marriage
One of the tricky things about being “recently married” is that the missus was in name limbo. “Technically,” she’s my wife with my last name (that’s right!). “Legally,” she still retains her maiden name until she goes to the Social Security Administration to change her SS card name and the DMV or MVA to change her license name. So what happens when we get a check written out to her new name? Trickiness! Headaches! But not to fret, I’ll try to capture everything we’ve done so that it can be as painless as possible for all you newlyweds out there.
First, just to cover the check situation, she just needed to sign her new name (what the check was made out to) followed by her former name (the name on the account), to deposit the check. In reality, unless the issuer contests it, chances are anything reasonable would’ve worked.
Now, onto the name changes…
Marriage License
This is the linchpin of the whole name changing operation. Everything requires this and no names can be changed without the signed marriage license or certificate. The fact that it’s been issued is proof enough that the state recognizes the marriage and the signature is proof that the marriage went through, the document was never notarized, as is required of many legal documents, but having a notary there probably would’ve killed the mood.
Driver’s License
You’ll need to go to the DMV/MVA (whatever the place is called in your state) to make this name change request. In Maryland, you’ll need to go to a full service location with your marriage certificate and current license. Like every other trip to the DMV/MVA, I’d budget a healthy few hours and a few dollars to take care of this but somehow my wife was able to get in and out on a Tuesday morning in about half an hour (they run two different queues and the driver’s license queue was ridiculously short that day). The great thing about this step is that you are immediately issued a new license, there’s no need to wait around for one to be mailed to you.
Social Security Card
Changing your name on a Social Security Card is a bit trickier and the Social Security Administration provides this guidance, which is essentially you need to fill out a new application. You can mail in the application with the original or certified copies support documentation (proof of citizenship, legal name change, and proof of identity), but I would just go into an office rather than risking the mail. One gotcha here is that you need to bring proof of your old name too, so an expired Passport will do nicely.
Your Company HR
This step is crucial after you change your name with Social Security because your employer will be reporting Social Security payments. Depending on your company, this could be a pain or this could be a cinch. Either way, contact HR about changing your name and you will need, at most, the same documents you used for Social Security.
Passport
If your passport was issued within a year of the marriage, you’ll need to fill out a Name Change, Data Correction, and Limited Passport Book Replacement Form: DS-5504 and send it in with two Passport photos, a certified copy of your marriage certificate, and your old passport (and $60 if you want expedited service). If it was more than a year, you’ll unfortunately need to apply for a totally new Passport with Form DS-82 (and pay $60).
Online Accounts
Strangely enough, changing your name on online accounts turns out to be a bigger PITA than anything. For example, we are both members of Southwest’s Rapid Rewards Frequent Flyer program and for her to change her name, she needs to send the request in writing along with a photocopy of the marriage certificate and her driver’s license. At first I thought, “why the hassle?” until I realized it was all in the name of security, and rightfully so. I recommend starting this process as soon as you get the driver’s license because the processing time could be a few weeks.



14 responses to “Changing Your Maiden Name After Marriage”
CK responds:
Posted: March 26th, 2008 at 1:17 pm
Jimbo- curious to know what you 2 are doing for health insurance now? are you both still with your seperate policies or is she moving to yours or viceversa?
Rick Morley responds:
Posted: March 26th, 2008 at 2:17 pm
Ah, sounds like a wonderful problem to be having. I wish I had a wife to have this problem with…
Chief Family Officer responds:
Posted: March 26th, 2008 at 2:29 pm
I seem to recall that in California at least, you had to do SSA first before you could do anything else, including DMV.
Like you, I didn’t trust the mail and went in person. For fellow Californians: when you go to DMV, MAKE AN APPOINTMENT!!! It saves such a huge headache.
Chief Family Officer responds:
Posted: March 26th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
Let me clarify that second paragraph: I went to the SSA in person b/c I didn’t trust the mail. I got my new card pretty quickly, if I recall correctly. Then I went to DMV, again in person, where I was able to bypass the miles-long line (maybe hours-long would be more accurate) thanks to my appointment.
jim says in reply:
Posted: March 26th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
CK: I went on her policy, her company pays for it all (very nice!)
fefotz responds:
Posted: March 26th, 2008 at 3:54 pm
I recently got married too and it was a real hassle to get my name changed. I live in California and had to change with SSA first before DMV. As CFO mentioned making an appointment with DMV saves alot of time. ALso one thing to note is that titles of vehicles under the old name needs to be changed too… this is not taken cared of by changing name on the driver’s license alone.
Penelope responds:
Posted: March 26th, 2008 at 5:20 pm
OMG! I just sat at the SSN office for TWO AND A HALF HOURS yesterday! Make an appointment with them too and save yourself the time and hassle.
OTOH, DMV took 15 minutes tops…
donna jean responds:
Posted: March 26th, 2008 at 6:32 pm
online accounts are a pain, i realize I still haven’t done ING and hope that doesn’t cause too much turmoil this tax season as my name now doesn’t match the 1099 I got.. oops, guess it’s about time to finally get that taken care of.
savvy responds:
Posted: March 27th, 2008 at 8:30 am
When I changed my name, I found that (somewhat alarming) some companies didn’t require any verification (i.e. marriage license or new DL). I called and asked my name to be changed and they did it. That said, I still haven’t changed my name with ShareBuilder because they wanted a notarized form and I didn’t feel like bothering.
Lau responds:
Posted: March 27th, 2008 at 2:16 pm
After all the fun to look forward to, I wonder why I never changed my name!
Hubby’s not too happy about it, but its such a hassle…
Thanks for the list though. If I ever get to it, I’ll know exactly where to and who to call
Yvette responds:
Posted: March 28th, 2008 at 12:44 am
I’m always shocked to learn that women are still changing their names after marriage. I would think we would have abandoned that patriarchal custom long ago.
thomas responds:
Posted: March 29th, 2008 at 12:32 am
my wife’s grandmother still writes us checks with my wife’s maiden name. I have yet to run into a problem with a bank not cashing the check.
Ricardo Roman responds:
Posted: April 15th, 2008 at 2:27 pm
My daughter is asking me for my SS# in order to change her name. She said it was for reference??? Anyone ever heard of that one before? Please, I’d like to know.
Jessica responds:
Posted: April 18th, 2008 at 6:21 pm
@ Yvette: In Chinese culture women don’t change their surnames