Synthetic Diamond Engagement Rings

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When I read this question about “fake” engagement rings, I was pretty surprised. Essentially a young man wants to get his girlfriend a nice engagement rings but can’t afford a “real” diamond yet so he was going to buy her a synthetic diamond and then make the swap later. What he wants to know is whether he should tell her or just make the Indiana Jones type swap when she’s not paying attention. Okay, I may have laughed when I read how ludicrous of a question this was, in part because of the deception and in part because of the emphasis on “real” vs. “fake” (synthetic).

Obviously the experts tell him to be truthful with his girlfriend, you had to have seen that coming (especially since it’s a column about ethics), but I want to address the idea of synthetic diamonds. By synthetic diamonds, I mean diamonds that are lab created and not nature created; I don’t consider actually fake diamonds, like QVC’s Diamonique®, to be synthetic. Lab created diamonds are actual diamonds except they are absolutely perfect and generally cheaper than naturally occurring diamonds.

Considering that the concept of the diamond engagement ring was a creation of De Beers, does it really matter, I mean when it really comes down to it, how much it costs? That’s really the only distinguishing feature between a synthetic diamond and a real diamond – the cost. Does your love mean any more or less because the diamond was created by a guy in a lab coat or eons of pressure? Probably not.

Your fiancee’s (or your) friends will still oogle over the ring, oblivious to its actual origin (no one will ask for the diamond’s birth certificate because no one will care) because that doesn’t matter. Most are just caught up in the excitement of another engagement and ultimately, the ring is only a small part of the bigger picture.

Personally, I didn’t get a synthetic diamond because it never entered my mind as an option, probably because De Beers and the diamond cartel has me, along with a whole bunch of other people, thoroughly brainwashed. 🙂

{ 43 comments, please add your thoughts now! }

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43 Responses to “Synthetic Diamond Engagement Rings”

  1. thriftychic says:

    Ugh! DO NOT get a synthetic stone and tell your fiance it is a natural diamond. My fiance did this to me and I wish I had thrown the ring back in his face! He even had the audacity to blame my ‘high expectations’ for his deception. Any man willing to lie and cheap out on his bride before they are married will definitely do the same after the wedding.

    Be honest. If the guy doesn’t have the money or doesn’t want to spend the money on a ring he feels will make his prospective fiancee happy, then they need to discuss it beforehand. She may surprise him and accept something that fits in his budget.

    • mpate1 says:

      “She may surprise him and accept something that fits in his budget.”

      Wow. I mean that’s just horrible. You should be ashamed of yourself. Seriously.

      • MamaTT says:

        It’s so totally amusing to me that you chose “thriftychic” as your name…what a crock!
        I do agree that lies are unnecessary though.

    • noneya says:

      I agree with you. Its one thing if he is broke but its another thing if he can afford a nice ring but would rather spend his money on himself. Which is what happened to me. Being proposed to is one of the most important days in a girl’s life. If you cheap out with a ring thats not going to last long, neither will her love for you!.

    • cdiver says:

      Lies will never bring happiness but why should a man have to spend 3 months of his salary to buy a woman a stone to prove that he loves her.
      This cultural norm is wrong. He shows you he loves you every day by putting up with your ass.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Fake rings are bull shit. Sorry but it is total shit. If you decide to marry a girl then you should give her the best that you can. My boyfriend wants to give me a fake ring so he can buy another car! I dumped him. Engagement is off. I think all the asshole who make these fake diamonds and convice guys to trick their girls should go to hell! Screw you all. Cars are more important than your girl? SICK

    • Anonymous says:

      you dont deserve him nor do you deserve to find happiness with that kind of attitude!

    • cdiver says:

      If he tried to trick you then he should go to hell. However if he openly told you you, then even after depreciation of the vehicle, I think he might have made the right decision.

  3. Beck says:

    WOW you need to stop being a gold digger….i am getting married and i am seriously considering getting a “fake” diamond but that is because we are unable to afford a nice “real” diamond ring. Eventually we can change out the stone for a real one if i want, you can always do that. but reallllly you dumped your boyfriend because he wanted to give you a fake ring….bitch go get a job and buy your own damn diamond ring and quit being such a c***. there are way more important things in life then your dumb ass.

    • Rumi says:

      Look, I totally understand breaking up with someone who doesn’t consider my needs at all. “NO ring for you, the supposed love of my life, but I’m going to get MYSELF a new car?” That doesn’t sound like it’s about the money at all, it’s about a lack of consideration. An engagement ring is a token of eternal love. It is something that she will look at for the rest of her life and think of all the love that her and her husband share, the same with his wedding band. Honestly I wish that I could give my BOYFRIEND an engagement ring as well, but I guess that’s for the ceremony.

      I’m sure she would have been fine with any ring if it hadn’t been followed up with, and now I’m going to spend 3 times as much on myself, you’re not worth it.

  4. territories says:

    Absolutely i want a synthetic ring. Its cheaper now, and a “real” diamond is nothing but a deBeers construct – read the atlantic article detailing the marketing, as Jim referenced. Its all a scam! I’m helping us buy a house and lots of cute baby clothes instead of a tiny chunk of rock to wear on my finger because its a status symbol. “Fake” diamonds are still diamonds, and the fact that they dont have imperfections… who wouldnt want that anyway? And i’m getting a big one. Most people wouldnt know the difference if it stuck them in their eye anyway. There are more important things in life.

  5. KAYLA says:

    OK, I have been looking around on the internet, and have only found a few websites that sell “synthetic diamonds”. Gemesis, apollo, carat, and Sitara gems. they all seems to say something different about the way they make them. I’m wondering what website sells real, man made diamonds. Help!

    • realgirl says:

      I also have looked at synthetic diamonds and found another company that makes them, Diamond Nexus. I am not educated on how they are made, but they have some beautiful stones.

  6. realgirl says:

    after studying about blood diamonds i have told my boyfriend that i absolutely do not want a mined diamond. I would be just as happy with a lab made diamond, after all, love is not about a ring on your finger, it’s about the things and ways he shows his love. And I would not want to pay a 100-200% markup for a rock that is not all that rare anyway. I think saying that a diamond ring shows his love is just shallow.

  7. lil_miss says:

    It continues to astonish me that so many women are blank minded when it comes to expecting a diamond. We live in a world where there are resources at our finger tips and yet so many people choose to stay uneducated. Unfortunately, these are the people who will buy conflict or blood diamonds and not know the difference. It’s hard for a man to spend three months of salary on a diamond ring because that’s what he’s suppose to do. If my boyfriend spent three month salary on a ring for me I would be livid… it would be beautiful but it would go down as the worse purchases he could make. We can afford the real thing but I could never admire a diamond I didn’t know for sure wasn’t the root cause of a poor child losing a hand or worse. You can ask for paperwork on the diamond in a store and most retailers would be happy to give you the information, but who’s to say the paperwork is real.
    As for “fake” diamonds I am of the belief that the simulated diamonds are just that. If a man can only afford that so be it, he’s showing his love for you by wanting to spend the rest of his life with you…be grateful. I do believe that he should tell her to save her from an embarrassing trip to insure the ring or appraise it. Synthetic diamonds on the other hand are lab made diamonds. The technology has grown so much and now these diamonds are available at significantly lower prices than “real” diamonds. The lab diamonds are made up of the same properties and structure but are flawless….seems horrid right?! Lol. Lab diamonds cannot be classed as a “fake” diamond because they are real…just made in a lab.
    We can’t stop the terror that happens in third world countries but shouldn’t we all try to do our part? To close up, if you want an earth grown diamond expect to spend lots and make sure you do your research on the company you are buying it from. If you go with a lab diamond well I say good for you! And now you have more money to spend on the big day. If you decide on the simulated diamond just make sure she’s modest enough to know it’s not the diamond that makes the marriage.

  8. Janie Lane says:

    My guy proposed to me with a cheque… all folded up into a little paper ring…and told me to get whatever I wanted. I know it doesn’t sound super romantic, but it worked for us. I took the money and bought myself a small plain ring, got him some expensive gadgets he wanted and put the rest in the bank for us.

    In my ring shopping though I did a lot of research because I did consider a cultured diamond. What peeves me is companies using the name diamond (as in “lab created diamond” and “man made diamond”) when they are no such thing. If you sell a CZ, or a coated CZ or a “crystalline structure coated in diamonds” YOU ARE NOT SELLING A DIAMOND, so quit using the word. DNL is one of the worst companies putting out crap information about what they sell, but they’re not the only one.

    Companies like Apollo and Gemesis actually create a crystalline form of CARBON, which is a diamond. Diamond = Carbon, and anything that isn’t just C will not have the same optical and hardness properties of a diamond.

    If it’s shiny and pretty and you like it, buy it. Who cares what it is… but companies should be honest and stop trying to confuse sythentics with simulants.

    Oh, and real man-made diamonds (ie. crystalline carbon) made via the HPHT method are by no means flawless. Just like mined diamonds they have inclusions and imperfections.

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